Saints vs. Pheasants

Last night my dad, Karl, and I went to our first Saint Paul Saints game and we had a great time.

The Saints have a pair of pig mascots this year named Kim Lardashian and Kris Hamphries, and we were lucky enough to be guests at their wedding! But first, the Saints had to play some baseball against the Sioux Falls Pheasants…



At Midway Stadium, the diversions are just as fun as the game. Our entertainment for the night was a cast of characters roaming the stadium. I had two favorites. The first was the Robber Baron/Owner of the team, a late nineteenth/early twentieth century tycoon wearing an ill-fitting suit (think Daniel Plainview in flood pants). The whole game I was worried he would walk up and drink my milkshake.

My other favorite was The Nerd. For most of the game, he planted himself atop the visitors’ dugout right in front of us, dancing, prancing, and cheer-leading all night. He didn’t seem to know much about baseball, but that was part of the fun.


After every frame Kim and Kris were trotted out on the field to be bottle-fed by the umpire, and there are crazy contests going on at the same time. These lucky kids had to drive their White Castle cars around the cones and into the white castle. The winner got a free slider. The loser got two free sliders (not really, but I can’t imagine 7-year-olds enjoying White Castle).


As the game went on, the Pheasants looked like they were going to sneak by the Saints. But in the bottom of the ninth inning, Karl’s favorite player Ronnie Bourquin came through with a HUGE home run to extend the game to extra innings (The Nerd reported that it was going into overtime because the teams had a field goal apiece). In the top of the 13th, the Pheasants’ Cory Morales hit a home run that plopped into the left field hot tub. The Saints couldn’t match it, and we lost 4-3. But that was just the warm-up for the nuptials.



It was a beautiful wedding. The bridesmaids were four men dressed in Marilyn Monroe drag, and the groomsmen were two goats and two sheep. It was officiated by a local radio personality.

After the wedding, we stuck around for the excellent fireworks and then called it a night. Karl was tired when we got home about 12:15, but he’s been talking about how much fun he had all day today.